Naming something like Depression, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder can be helpful in its initial stages, but over time it becomes another excuse for self-deprecation and an opportunity to step on to the shame train. After all, if my thinking is distorted, my behavior is hyper active, my affect is labile, my fears are anxious, my vigilance is paranoia, how am I ever going to heal? How do I get off the shame train if when I come for help within the mental health system, I am further stigmatized by multiple labels that at the end of the day do nothing to facilitate change or motivate me to feel differently about myself or others. Labels are important for understanding what might be going on and that’s about it. Labels also further entrench people into a shame spiral that quite frankly becomes, ” I am damaged goods.”
We are in such an interesting cross roads in mental health. What was once considered appropriate in terms of language of normal verses abnormal, is slowly changing to a an appreciation to different kinds of normal, as well as, understanding and recognizing the multiple ways a human being adapts to different situations in life. What society deems as bad or good is actually a judgement that is neither helpful nor healing.
Humans find all kinds of ways to adapt to situations. Children are creative in their attempts to adapt to dysfunctional or painful family situations. They find ways to distract attention away from their tense mother who is arguing with their father. They find ways to take care of the sick or addicted parent to ensure a kind of stability within the family system.
These ways of adapting are too often ignored and instead pathologized into labels that represent maladaptive behaviour within the mental health system. There are too many behaviours now that are labelled disorders largely to justify a pharmaceutical solution. Don’t get me wrong pharmaceuticals can be very helpful and in many cases a necessary part of recovery especially if one happens to suffer from a serious mood disorder like major depression, bipolar, ADHD or psychosis, however, more often than not, maladaptive behaviours to dysfunctional systems are looked at from an micro rather than a macro place causing the individual to be blamed for a dysfunctional system. If, for example you grew up in a dysfunctional family, you will likely suffer from symptoms of low self-worth, stinking thinking, depression, and flashbacks of some of the nightmare you survived. Then lets say you go to psychiatrist for help and you are given the following disorders
A) Major depressive disorder
B) Anxiety Disorder
From a psychiatric point, these are perfectly reasonable diagnosis given your history, however if we think broader we would determine that it is perfectly understandable that you are anxious given your history of surviving a dysfunctional home – even more understandable that you are now working for a job where you continue to be invalidated and demoralized which has now increased your anxiety to look like a ” disorder.” Of course you are depressed because you are working in an oppressive system. Who wouldn’t be?
When we unpack our feelings – go deeper we realize that feelings are normal – feelings are instinctual – important and entirely necessary to negotiate this thing we call life. All feelings have jobs. Sadness job – to let go to grieve. Anger – to make it right, undo a wrong, Fear to protect us ( fight flight freeze) Rage – to keep us alive and protect. Joy – to experience life in its fullest. Guilt – to make something wrong right. Anxiety – a break from feeling – to prevent feeling fear or hurt.
The next time you are on the shame train because you have been diagnosed with a ” disorder, ” ask yourself, ” ok, what am I dealing with in terms of feelings.?” “What is their job and how can I use my feelings to show me or educate me on what I need to do to heal?”
Worthit2bme 